PND – my post natal depression as the doctor reported was quite bad and I would need medication and to speak to someone…both of which I did not want to do.
Medication –
▪ from what I have learnt about medication is that you need to be on it for at least 6-9 months if it is your first episode of depression.
▪ There’s not much point taking it unless you are going to make an effort to try and help yourself too otherwise it just keeps you at a certain level.
▪ it’s very hard to come off it without support from your GP
Talking therapy – now I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I was not having bad thoughts about my children (luckily) and felt I needed a quick fix. I definately didn’t need to talk to anyone. But for some reason I gave it a go.
I was terrified at my first appointment but turns out that I like to talk 😊. I did Cognitive behaviour therapy. I discovered that my PND did not just stem from having a baby, that was the trigger.
My view of the world and myself stemmed from my childhood. I have issues with how I am perceived by others which started when I was bullied at school, which is scary as to how much that bullying has had on my life. One thing that it has taught me is to make sure my children don’t be mean to others.
This view has affected everything I do and think about. I overthink things that people say, the way people look at me, things people don’t say etc but now I have insight into this now which helps me to be me….not always but it does help.
I completed my CBT and have been on the medication for over a year. There are times when I intend to come off the medication, but then life gets in the way or people visit or it’s school holiday etc.
I am still recovering….
Poppet and Pumpkin 